7 Animals Better At Casino Gambling Than You Are

We consider ourselves the highest form of life on the planet but when it comes to casino gambling there are some animals out there that have all the skills required to turn a bank roll into a fortune. Here’s seven of the most capable.

1. Cats

You don’t need to be an expert in US gambling laws to know instinctively that cats are the epitome of gambling. Any animal willing to attempt to gain food from a human that fed it no more than fifteen minutes ago is manifestly used to pushing its luck on a daily basis. Casino gambling might be beyond them what with the whole opposable thumbs issue, but ask yourself how lucky you’d have to be if getting fed, being housed and looked after all depended on how cute you could go “Meow”.

2. Elephants

By reputation Elephants never forget which, when it comes to casino gambling, gives them a distinct edge. You don’t need to habitually read the fabulous bingo review or blackjack tips on our site to know that if an elephant starts counting cards it’s all over bar the dip in profit margins. This is, of course, why you rarely see an elephant in a casino; Casinos across the world have banned Elephants from their premises for their regular employment of card counting strategies and trunk related cheating methods.
Many now play at Bet365 anonymously.

3. Mimic Frogs

For few humans outside the legal profession, public relations and the worlds of crime and politics does actual lying play a pivotal role in their daily lives. All humans will tell lies on occasion, but most don’t need to, however when it comes to bluffing even the practiced masters of the art would be as to nought compared with the Mimic Frogs such as Ranitomeya Imitator who fake being poisonous as a defense mechanism. Casino gambling would hold no fears for a frog that bets its life on a bluff and gets eaten if it loses.

4. Pandas

When casino gambling or placing a bet on sports in the US one is always taking a risk, however when it comes to pushing the limits of jeopardy Pandas win, appearing to hope that if they just sit around chewing bamboo their species will perpetuate itself on nothing but good intentions. You have to be quite the risk taker to be locked in a zoo alone for years and then reject the first fuck buddy that arrives because you don’t like his/her whiskers, but that’s the problem with Panda, it’s all so black and white.

5. Peacocks

The mating rituals of humans are a tortuous tangle of conventions, expectations and moments of sheer knicker wetting fearful awkwardness, however were your luck in the hustle & bustle of romantic love dependent on wiggling your arse whilst dressed in feathers it’s fair to say you’d be taking a larger proportional risk to getting a new hair cut and making sure your underwear is clean. Casino gambling is a breeze for peacocks, however they prefer to play on Bet365 at home where they need not wiggle quite so much as they play.

6. Squirrels

Putting your life on the line just going shopping can seem a little strange to those outside the US gambling news of universal gun-ownership won’t hit the headlines in response to whatever Islamic State do next, however Squirrels each and every winter gamble that they can remember where some of their many hoards of nuts* are located, this makes casino gambling look almost petty by comparison since its rare that one stakes starvation on the next round of baccarat or roll of the dice at the craps table.

7. Yeti

Perhaps the most feared casino gamblers in the world these mystical creatures rarely make an appearance at anything but the most exclusive of ‘high-roller’ tables and whilst they’re easy to spot by their retinue of Buddhist monks and publicity agents fending off interview requests it is best to be wary of these gargantuans of gambling, these beasts of betting, these wild things of wagers. Rumors that an international cartel of Yeti are saving up to buy Mount Everest to turn it into ski resort are erroneous however some still do visit Bet365 for sports betting purposes.

* Hoards of nuts are easy to locate in the continental United States all year round – just visit congress.