The 5 Worst Wax Statues In Football

If you become a popular, high paid footballer, you also become some sort of celebrity. What’s more, you might even get a wax statue, like Britney or Angelina. However, nothing guarantees that it’s going to look all pretty or even human. Some footballers’ figures are simply awful. We’ve collected some of them – here are our top 5 worst wax statues in football.

You often see these wax statues about celebrities, and most of the times they look awesome. For instance, London’s Madame Tussauds is full of great figures. Even footballers received quite few ones. However, sometimes things could go wrong and the final result is disturbing. This article is about those ones: the 5 worst wax statues in football!

5. Meet Ben Foster’s creepy cousin, Ken Foster

West Bromwich Albion posted this cringy video on YouTube back in 2014. The title says “There’s only two Ben Fosters!” and it’s about how they’ve created a wax statue for their keeper. They started off with showing us how the modelling went and how hard it was for Foster to deal with all the hassle. “It all looks professional, the result should be amazing” – we thought. It turned out rather shocking though:

Firstly, they forgot Foster’s beard which made his statue look like a Ken doll. It’s just looking in the distance with a half smile on his face – a bit like a serial killer would. The goalie seemed to be well happy with the result though. He even asked whether he could get one to take home. Just imagine that scene. You arrive home after a tiring day at the office, turn the lights on, and the first thing you see is this weird, creepy figure of yourself. Staring at you with the smile of a murderer.

4. Frank de Boer’s statue has the most awkward face ever

The Netherlands legend Frank de Boer didn’t get away with having a weird statue of himself either. The former Barcelona player has 519 professional appearances, making him one of the most respected players in his country. However, this statue shows anything but respect and pride: it’s rather funny.

As we can recall Frank de Boer’s hair was a lot more blonde, and his face was, you know, just a bit more human-like. This statue illustrates how you look like when you meet your Tinder date but they don’t match their pictures at all. It has nothing to do with de Boer which makes it definitely one of the worst wax statues in football.

3. Wax-Messi looks like he’s only here to annoy Ronaldo

Just look at these two magnificent wax figures. On the right, there is Cristiano Ronaldo, five times Ballon d’Or winner, one of the best footballers the world’s ever seen. His face is not just perfectly recognizable, but actually human. He looks at you welcomingly, with a smile on his face, holding a ball, like he is about to ask you to join his five-a-side team.

On the left, there’s something else. This is how the Annoying Orange would look like if it magically turned into a human. His eyes are extremely close to his mouth, and there’s that weird, enormous nose above the Jim Carrey-mouth. Besides that, he looks 40. Legend says it’s Lionel Messi, but it just can’t be him. On a serious note, it’s really shocking how one can produce such a great statue and drop the quality so much with the next one.

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2. The incredible Kahn could be the new Marvel sensation

German goalkeeper Oliver Kahn has never been a calm, quite lad. It’s actually his insane rants that made him quite iconic besides his fantastic saves. Many like to illustrate him as a shouting, aggressive fella, demanding his defenders to concentrate until the very last minute. However, this wax statue of him went way too far with it.

This figure of the Madame Tussauds museum of Berlin is more like Bruce Banner turning into the incredible Hulk in a few seconds. He’s going mad! If his face wasn’t that red he could be a perfect fit for AMC’s The Walking Dead. Maybe this should be the right statue for Ben Foster to take home and scare his children with.

1.This is the angriest Wayne Rooney’s ever been

Let’s face it, poor Rooney’s never been the best looking guy around. A tour guide at Stamford Bridge once told me that they used to have a mirror in the visitors’ dressing room, but it broke when Wazza looked in it. He’s doing alright though, he has a beautiful wife and four children.

He obviously had great success in football as well, and online sportsbook sites in the United Kingdom argue he could aim for trophies in the US before he retires. He received many wax statues for his achievements around the globe, but there’s one that doesn’t look glorious at all.

He looks like Shrek defending his swamp. It’s not sure whether he’s happy for a goal, angry because of a yellow card, or tries to bounce back in an enthusiastic rock-paper-scissors game. He’s never been a calm player – many argue his anger gave him wings at his prime, but again, this figure is way too angry and way too ugly. What about his teeth? Poor Wazza deserves better than this.