10 Alternative Uses For Casinos

Whilst currently a blight on our society and landscape casinos don’t necessarily have to be casinos with many other uses to which they could be put

Just because brick&mortar casinos are passe anachronisms that should be scythed away like so many dead weeds polluting our wonderful garden world, doesn’t mean the actual buildings should be bulldozed flat and turned into parkland – however nice a mental image that might well be – and whilst people who like to gamble or bet on sports in the US will still do so in the hugely nicer online environments like those of Bet365, there are a whole host of uses to which a former casino could be re-purposed.

1. Homeless Shelter

With thousands of rooms empty a former resort/hotel casino could be the ideal place in which to give those poor unfortunates without a roof over their heads a warm, dry place to sleep. There are already facilities to feed them too should the funds be made available, and why would they not? Why shouldn’t we privileged with so much good fortune not assist those less lucky than ourselves? At least then these monoliths to greed would be put to a far more moral purpose.

2. Hospital

Casinos Re-purposed
• Hospital or Hospice
• College Dorm
• FEMA Death Camp

Whilst not particularly suited to becoming a replacement for an existing emergency room or surgical department for low intensity medical treatment or prolonged-stay recuperation the great number of rooms could be perfect. The additional on-site facilities perhaps making them perfect centers for the recuperation of military veterans, both those with physical and mental difficulties arising from their time in the services, perhaps in the grandeur they so rightfully deserve.

3. Hospice

There are plenty of situations in which secure centralized accommodation is an applicable and necessary facility. Those seeking escape from domestic violence, gang involvement, prostitution, or a religious cult need a refuge amongst people who have had the same experiences, in a location that can provide counseling as well as security. That society is in need of such facilities is in no doubt, and an adapted resort casino could be ideal.

4. Conference center

This is a no-brainer. The ever expanding desire for conference space can easily be catered for by these one time palaces of gambling. The number of rooms, function spaces, and public areas make them superb for the task and indeed some of the space made by the decrease in gambling news media stories say, in Atlantic City at least, has already been re-purposed to this usage. The benefit of this concept is that it provides the apparently necessary profit motive for investors.

5. College dorm

The growing aspirations of youth have rapidly expanded the requirement for higher education and the increase in demand will need to be catered for. Once again the number of communal areas, combined with catering facilities and the large number of rooms are only enhanced in suitability by the tacky décor and gaudy design that are entirely suited to being filled with a bunch of lazy, stoned, drunken, sex obsessed weirdos who are apparently the future of our planet. God help us all.

6. Military Base

With the seemingly endless supply of overseas wars there is a growing need not just for barracks space, but for facilities that would lend themselves to the secure prosecution of electronic, signals and remotely-piloted military operations. Chief complaint amongst drone pilots is the rather primitive locations in which they have to work despite being nowhere near the combat zone, replacing shipping containers in the desert with a nice air conditioned former casino might be just the ticket.

7. Prison

The growing prison population, in the US gambling laws on marijuana being changed might lead to a decrease in their overcrowding problem, would not all suit residence in a building that was previously a casino. However there are plenty of low-risk prisoners or people awaiting immigration hearings within the system that might well be housed in an adapted house of gambling. The internal security systems are already high quality and with suitable additions could easily be made to keep people in as well as out.

8. CIA Black Site

The old saying “What happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas” indicates the degree to which there is already an air of secrecy and duplicity about these places, and indeed big losers will probably quip they’ve caused much suffering already, so why not? With lots of space for all the various requirements, sensory and sleep deprivation, waterboarding and all those other “enhanced” techniques there’s a lot of scope for the intelligence services to abuse human rights without having to go abroad to do so.

9. FEMA Death Camp

When the New World Order(TM) take over there’s going to need to be more than a few fenced off warehouses in the middle of nowhere to deal with all the useless sheep-like humans that don’t feature in the future they’ve got planned for us all. A casino could easily be made into a selection, processing, execution and disposal site with very little work at a cost that FEMA could afford in locations already chosen to be near the expendable portions of the population. The existing recreation facilities would also be a boon for the staff.

10. Area 51 Replacement

Where once it might have been acceptable to stick our extraterrestrial visitors in an aircraft hangar in the middle of the desert surrounded by the sort of guards that shoot first and never ask any questions whatsoever, these days the well heeled galactic travelers of our universe expect a far higher standard of accommodation and whilst the casinos are ugly both inside and out it is unlikely the improvement in circumstance would not be appreciated by those eventually housed there.

This list is, of course, not exhaustive and indeed we encourage additional suggestions in the comments section below. Just what would YOU do with an empty casino?

Read more about why casinos are being replaced by internet gambling.